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I am a one man band. I never had a guru who could guide into answering the questions that have haunted me since the day in 1998 that I lost my cherished scientific career after a span of 18 years from 1979 to 1988 conducting material laboratory-based experimental research on Natural Resources of the Earth in terms of plant products and their effects on animals from which we deduced their usage for humans. It was very interesting life and I enjoyed every day that I was working in the laboratory and in the field to transfer the technology so developed. But it came to a shuddering halt. and I was puzzled because I had been expelled from the Institute that I worked for on a disciplinary charge of gross misconduct. It shattered me. One could not go on with such a bad defamation as I saw it then.
So I was depressed, confused, and entered from a nervous breakdown requiring psychiatric assessment which I know nothing about so had to take the words of the Psychiatrists as supervised by the legal authorities of the United Kingdom. I entered a frame of mind that was heavy all the time in persistent delusions between the material and the mental spheres of my life.
I had to abandon the material sphere altogether as time showed that I could not hold on to even menial jobs that I needed to do to make ends meet in order just to survive. I had to sort my mind out. This I did without a Teacher like we Hindus in India have to straighten people along the right frame of mind and channel their daily chores in a more controlled way than the libertarian way I had adopted in living the life of Riley, as they say. The riches to rags story had to find the correct manner with which it could be reversed if I was to live productively from the age of 40, with a wife and daughter to live together in the family home. I tried all kinds of experiments to gain some insight into my thought processes, my visions and hallucinatory experiences during the struggle that I went through in sorting out where I had gone wrong. I took enormous trouble through legal channels to find this out through years of depression, during which I ended up in the mental hospital here in the United Kingdom on two occasions still not behaving correctly to truly acclimitise and adapt to life in the United Kingdom. These two mental hospital spells, the first in 2004 and the next in 2008, made me even more determined that I must seek out a solution to my mental disorder. I did not wish to lose my liberty again. I has held in the Community since 2008, still under anti-psychotic and anti-depressant medications, even to this day.
But I was making progress. I used an experimental framework for trying to improve my mental state in adopting the quest for truth-accommodation that I called as a Hindu satya-advaitic yoga.
Today at the age of 64, I consider that I have found the elixir spiritually that leaves me with the peace of mind and even bliss in the experience of happiness or ananda/joy that I am presently experiencing.
I wish to share these thoughts with people worldwide through the creation of this website.
Thank you for reading. Hope you all find it useful and giving all mental patients the tools by which they can all get to terms with their mental disorders to be able to live in harmony within their societies of the States which house them and provide them with material needs and comforts to enjoy life.
Dr Shantanu Panigrahi
FORA FOR PUBLIC DISCUSSIONS: http://pub46.bravenet.com/forum/3871902446/
BOOKS BY THE AUTHOR: https://archive.org/details/@panigrahi491 ; https://theallurementofrealityinreview.com/shop
ASSOCIATED WEBSITES: https://knowledgeforworldconservation.com ; http://satyaadvaitayoga.bravesites.com/